1. How the Logic of "Friendzoning" Would Work If Applied in Other Instances:

    • *Man walks into a store and finds employee*
    • Man:   Alright, I've had enough. Why haven't you guys hired me?!
    • Employee:   Uh...well sir, when did you put in your application?
    • Man:   I never filled out an application.
    • Employee:   Well sir, we can't consider you for employment if you've never filled out an application.
    • Man:   No, that's bullshit, because I've been coming here for years now, and every single time I tell you all how much I love this store and how much I appreciate your customer service, unlike some of your other customers might I add!
    • Employee:   Well, but that doesn't-
    • Man:   AND I even told you that I didn't have a job!
    • Employee:   But sir, that doesn't indicate to us that you would like a job at our store. And again, if you've never filled out an application, we can't consider you. Besides, we're not hiring.
    • Man:   OH! Not hiring, HA! What a laugh. I see your store go through seasonal workers all the time. They come and go like nothing, but you won't consider me as a part-time employee even though I KNOW you've been looking for workers to fill positions? That's insane!
    • Employee:   Sir, we've been looking to hire a few people for management positions. Do you have any management experience?
    • Man:   Well no, but what does that matter?
    • Employee:   ...Well sir, that's what we're looking for. You won't be suitable for the position without management experience.
    • Man:   Oh that's such a load of crap. You know, you'll be waiting around a long time for a manager if you don't lower your standards a little. Who cares if someone knows how to manage a store? I LOVE this store and I'm willing to work here, that's all that should matter to you.
    • Employee:   That...doesn't make any sense.
    • Man:   NO! I'm done. This is over. From now on, no more Mr. Nice Guy.
    • Employee:  
    • Man:  
    • Employee:  
    • Man:   Fuck you, slut.
  2. lill-ac:

    maybe if you came and fell asleep next to me I wouldn’t be so sad

    (via humorking)

    femifeisty:

    monsterstrongpiercing:

    The Selfie (x)

    Mother Fuck yes!! Plus I have a ton of good looking friends. I love when Ya’ll show me your mother fucking mugs.

    I can’t google how my fiends look today. I wanna see selfies and I wanna see them all the time. 

    (Source: anklbitrs, via whyismyfloweryellow)

    cindehella:

    cinematic masterpiece

    (via kingsleyyy)

  3. kingspongyy:

    thatdudeemu:

    Remember drink water eat fruit and stay positive

    & have orgasms. That is very important.

    (via p--sychedelia)

  4. neoliberalismkills:

    Do you ever get into an argument with someone and find yourself unable to speak for a moment because you’re just so blown away by how utterly wrong and ignorant the other person is being and you can’t understand how anyone could actually believe the things they are saying

    (Source: neoliberalismkills, via fake-mermaid)